So, this weekend I had a ‘moment’.
Like Lola, I am fiesty, fun, fearless and fabulous - how do I know? Because I tell myself every day, of course! Except for a moment, on friday, I let someone’s judgements and opinions about my fabulous-o self make me feel sad and bad.
It was a stinky boy-type, and he asked what I did for a living. I told him I write books and deliver workshops to help girls feel good about themselves, and do you know what he said? He said: “How can you do that when you’re overweight? I mean you’re really pretty, but you’re a big girl, you can’t be happy with yourself so how can you help others feel good about themselves?”
Without a hint of irony.
Now, I’m not a violent girl, but it was all I could do not to punch him on the nose, right there and then. I was so shocked at his audacity, that I didn’t know what to say, but when I was taking my make-up off later that evening, I realised I was mad. Not necessarily at what he had said, but that;
1. I didn’t have a kick-ass comeback - don’t you hate it when you think of a million, trillion things to say after the event?
2. That, momentarily, I gave a stinky boy-type permission to question my fabulousity - because I did, for a moment there, I thought, “gosh, what if he’s right? What if I’m a bad role model for girls?”
So I thought about it, and dealt with it in the only way I know how - I wrote it out in my journal. I won’t bore you with all the deets, but basically these were my conclusions:
* I rock, that’s factuality, and I’d still rock whether I was a size 6 or a size 20 - what matters to me is that I’m healthy, not what dress size I am. And newsflash to stinky, judgemental boy-types - you can be a size 16 AND healthy - it involves, walking, dancing and eating everything I like - in moderation.
* I’m fab at what I do, I’ve got a HUGE pink and fluffy file filled-to-the-brim with compliments, emails, and most importantly, letters from amazing Pink Ladies telling me how the books/the workshops have had a positive impact on their world…
* Most importantly, don’t let anyone ever make you feel bad about your sweet self, especially a stinky boy-type.
The same goes for you, chicas…People are entitled to have their own thoughts and opinions, even if they’re negative and not-very-nice, but they can only make you feel bad if you let ‘em, so don’t let ‘em, ‘k?
Keep your own pink fuzzy file for moments of self-doubt - fill it with nice emails from your gal-pals, a compliment a stranger made about your cute cardi…
Tell yourself ‘I’m fabulous’ at least three times a day before leaving the house…
Copy the quote below into your journal or onto a post it note so you can see it every, single day.
”No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” - Eleanor Roosevelt - kick-ass lady of awesomeness.



13 comments
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November 18th, 2008 at 12:39 pm
Hannah
You ARE a great role model for me and a trillion more girls in the UK and all over the world. You rock, and that is a fact. So don’t let some stinky idiot let you think any different!
Hannah x
November 18th, 2008 at 4:57 pm
aimee
WHere is this boy? do i have the permission to kill him? NONONO, u dont listen to this idiot! x
November 18th, 2008 at 5:34 pm
Sasha
That’s SSSSOOOOOOO RUDE!! I totally agree with Hannah! You are a role-model for millions of girls over the UK and there’s proof of that from this comment I’m writng. Boys don’t know anything.
November 18th, 2008 at 5:57 pm
Georgia
He sounds like he shares a one brain-cell with his friends. You have style, confidence and brains. Don’t let him knock your confidence!
Georgia x
November 18th, 2008 at 10:19 pm
Goddess Leonie
hey beautiful woman…
bless you and your goddess shaking it delicious self…
and for remembering your beauty when you needed to…
i think the boy would have said something negative to anyone who said they inspire others and are living their dreams… “but you’re too young… or old… or rich… or poor… or you laugh too loud… or you’re too quiet… to be doing THAT!” because what he’s saying is “i’m not inspiring others or living my dream… and i don’t feel good about that. i don’t think i’m good enough.”
bless him and his confused soul, may he remember his radiance,
and bless you with your remembering to be radiant,
you are SO SO LOVED
xoxoxoxo
Leonie I Creative Goddess
www.GoddessLeonie.com
November 19th, 2008 at 5:07 am
Lana
I totally agree with Hannah too!
You have made such a big impact on my life, and no stinky-poo boy can tell you other wise! YOU ARE AN AMAZING PERSON!!!!!!!
Lana xoxo
November 19th, 2008 at 6:39 pm
Diane Shipley
Oh, that makes me so mad! And sad. Why do we let stinky types (boy or girl) get to us like this?
Thank goodness you saw sense, though!
I’m still struggling to feel good about myself, tbh. Even when I was super-thin I felt fat and unhappy. Now health probs have left me overweight and undertoned, with some bad hormonal problems, all of which makes me feel like I look not so good - and when a close, otherwise kind family member picked me up on all this earlier this year I cried many times over it.
But then I tried to remember the people who inspire me, people with warmth and wit and beautiful smiles - and I have all those things (most of the time, anyway)! When other people say these things, it’s about them, not us.
Keep up the good work, Lisa - these things only make us stronger. xx
November 20th, 2008 at 10:58 pm
Lana
http://www.popartuk.com/g/l/lgst3241+boys-are-stupid-throw-rocks-at-them-boys-are-stupid-poster.jpg
November 20th, 2008 at 10:58 pm
Lana
oh that didn;t work here i will try again:
http://www.popartuk.com/g/l/lgst3241+boys-are-stupid-throw-rocks-at-them-boys-are-stupid-poster.jpg
November 20th, 2008 at 11:00 pm
Lana
nope still dosn’t work here just follow the link
November 20th, 2008 at 11:05 pm
Lana
http://www.davidandgoliathtees.com/games/throwrocks.html
that is a very satisfying game
November 21st, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Rai
Oh my daisies!
I can’t beleive this. I don’t know how someone dare say that to someone who inspires and helps people worldwide. Your books help me no end as you know, I tell you all the time haha.
And being a girl who has struggled with weight all her life it is good to know that people can still be gorgeous, amazing and fabulous and not have to be a zero to be happy with themselves. You encourage me to find my own happiness and not rely on boy/girlshapes to tell me I am beautiful.
Shocked to the max.
but always grateful to you. keep up the good work sister!
much love as always.
Rai
xoxo
December 7th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
lee-lee
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr I think that you shiuld of punched him! no-one should EVER listen stinky people and negative ninas like him. I think Lisa Clark is a fabulous role model! x