LYU month: Jessica Weiner

Jess Weiner is a go-for-it girl.

The Americano author, screenwriter, agony aunt and business woman has appeared on both Oprah and Tyra, she’s BFF with Ugly Betty and she makes girls across America feel totes fabulous-o everyday with her Love Yourself Up ‘tude - we love her. You will too as she spills her Love Yourself Up secrets, how to be mucho successful and tips on how to be a fabulous version of you…

So…what you waiting for? Meet Jess, she rules.

What it is you do exactly Jess?
I am the president of With Jess, LLC which is a company dedicated to helping women and girls define, discover and develop their Inner Style(tm). Within this company, I write books, do radio, appear on TV, write advice columns and create cool products for girls that help them with their self-esteem. So kinda like Martha Stewart built an empire around all things “outer” style - we are building one on ‘inner’ style!

There’s really nothing you can’t do is there? Author, screenwriter, agony aunt, businesswoman - where did you get this go-for-it girl ‘tude from and more importantly, how do we get it?
Well, I think my ‘tude comes from my family and friends - they’ve always helped me to feel confident in exactly who I am! I also have survived a period in my early teens where I was the complete opposite of who I am now and so I am thrilled to be able to share that excitement and passion with others. And I think YOU guys can get this attitude by finding something you are super passionate about and going after it - whether it is body image, or the environment, or playing soccer - do something you love and it never feels like work - always fun!

What was life as a teen girl like for you?
I definitely struggled with low self-esteem and bad body image. I didn’t ever think I was pretty enough or thin enough and I let that rule my teen life. Even though I was a super over achiever and getting good grades and involved in school stuff - inside I was pretty depressed and withdrawn. I began dieting when I was 11 and fell into an eating disorder around 13. So I spent many years of my teen life really battling this tough mental health issue.

What made you write your book ‘Do I Look Fat in this?’ and have your own struggles with body image contributed to the advice you give?
All of my advice is from my heart and my experiences. I haven’t studied any of this in school - I have lived it. And I write honestly about being a ‘woman in progress’. I don’t know it all. And I am not always right. But I try my best to be truthful with my audiences and let them know that it’s ok - if I survived - they will too!
What do you think are the main problems facing teen girls right now?
Well, I think we live in a world consumed with body image right now and that translates into the lives of teen girls because all the media they see is about how to be pretty, skinny, and well-dressed. There isn’t enough emphasis on Inner Style ™ and there is too much emphasis on what you look like. So girls internalize these messages and believe them to be true. And that can lead to dangerous dieting and behaviors that break you down- not build you up.

We often compare ourselves to the totally unreal images we see in the media. Why is that and what impact does that have on us?
The media is like high school personified. You read about the ‘popular girls’ and all their issues and we thrive on it because we like gossip and it is ALL around us. But the impact that this has on us is negative because we don’t get to see a diversity of images representing girls around the world. We see one image of beauty - white, blond, thin. And beyond that we don’t get to see ourselves. And because the media is so powerful and has the ability to beam thousands of messages to us daily - we have to make sure we are media literate and not letting our self-esteem become dictated by an advertisement or a superstar.

You define the word “fat” as “F-A-T = Feelings. Actions. Thoughts.” What does this mean?
All women - no matter what their size - use the word fat. And clearly many of these women aren’t fat by clinical terms - so it had me go searching for more of a meaning when a woman uses this word to describe how she is feeling. So I broke it down into feelings-thoughts-actions. Because we are so scared of our feelings that sometimes we just lump them into one category of ‘bad’ like the word ‘fat. And when we have all of these negative feelings they become negative thoughts in our mind and those negative thoughts can become negative actions - like extreme dieting or eating disorders. So we have to be careful how we use our feelings, thoughts, and actions and remember that fat is not a feeling!
What’s a day in the life of Jess like – care to share?
Well my days vary based on what I have going on. Last week was crazy. I flew to NYC on Monday to attend a luncheon at CosmoGirl! Magazine in honor of the new show “Ugly Betty” - so I got to see my friend and star of that show, America Ferrera and mingle with other strong super talented women! Then I flew back to LA on Tuesday and shot two episodes of the Tyra Banks show - they were both about body image and eating disorders. Then on Wed I flew to Orlando and shot a guest appearance on a new NBC show called “iVillage Live” and then I flew home on Friday to shoot another episode of Tyra - this one on racism and kids. So I was in three cities in one week and on 4 different TV shows! That isn’t a normal day - but lately I haven’t had many normal days! A good day will be when I can spend a few hours writing or answering e mails and then taking some meetings with my business partner on how to create cool programs for girls!

What do you love most about what you do?
I feel most blessed to have a platform to reach girls and women worldwide! I write an advice column on www.mary-kateandashley.com and we reach over 1 million girls in 10 countries. I love hearing different stories and ideas from girls around the world - it reminds me of similar we all are. And I love that I can use the media and Hollywood to put out good messages towards girls and women!
What makes you jump-in-the-air happy?
Being goofy with my family and friends. I love just being in our PJ’s and having a slumber party (you are never too old!) and just veg and watch TV and talk. I love being with the people I love. I value that very much!
So, what’s next in the world of Jess Weiner?
Well, I am going to get ready to write book #3 which should be out in early 2008 and I have some super cool events that we are planning for the rest of 2007. To stay tuned go to www.withjess.com and sign up for our Actionist newsletter!

I was a total outsider, the weird, chubby writer girl, until I began to Think Pink, that is! Jess, what advice would you give to readers who feel that life is a bit sucky right now?
I would say don’t despair and don’t you DARE go changing who you are. The world is ready to hear your message. And you must keep doing what you love. If you love to write - write. If you love to dance - dance. No matter what people tell you. Your happiness is about your inner self - not the outer world. And I know it’s hard to feel sucky in a world that always wants you to ‘fix it’ but the truth is - if I didn’t feel sucky, too, at some point in my life - I wouldn’t be here right now doing what I do. So embrace your SUCKY-NESS and keep going!!

Finally, the colour pink. Discuss.
Pink is all things girl to me: strong, sexy, bold, funny, quirky, and dynamic